All of us are taught as we grow up our family and society’s ideas of success. Few of us, have the natural talents and personality traits that fit in well with all of what we’re taught.
Mostly, there’s some aspect of our being that doesn’t fit in to these beliefs and concepts of success. And for some of us creative, modern renaissance types, the way we are just doesn’t mesh with the norm. We’ve been taught to think of ourselves as “flaky” because we have so many passions and interests and can’t seem to settle down.
The problem is we keep playing at a futile game, trying to please our family and our society, trying to adapt ourselves, and never feeling comfortable in our own skin.
If you are fed up with trying to fit in, here are three tips for creating success on one’s own terms:
- Create a new mold. Whether you are 26 or 86, stop blaming yourself for not fitting in! There are in fact an unlimited number of ways in which you can design life to suit your particular talents and personality make-up. You simply haven’t been shown what they are.Most people have never gotten clear about who they are and what their nature is. Or they’ve been trained for so many years to deny or ignore it that they can’t see it anymore. So, the first step is to rediscover and accept who you are.
- Model creative people who have led successful and fulfilling multifaceted lives. Instead of seeing all the examples of people who seem to be perfectly satisfied with one career and passion, search for role models who have led lives with the variety and excitement you secretly yearn for.
- Keep experimenting. Some ideas from your creative mentors may work for you. Others may not. Have the courage to use, adapt or discard what doesn’t fit. It takes awhile to figure out what works best.
Get past the “shoulds” and then you can see the key things to focus on for the moment as well as what can be left for another time, or dropped entirely. Lifestyle design changes over time, and is constantly adapted to what life brings you, as well as what you plan for.
How have you been limiting yourself by trying to fit in? Which of these ideas can you use right away to create success on your own terms? Go ahead and think of one step you can take today, to get you more aligned with your authentic self.