Usually when I hear things about the Christmas season being the happiest part of the year, I roll my eyes. Because I know it’s a hard time emotionally for so many people. And I include myself high upon that list. So instead of blithely wishing you a happy holiday season, I’d like to share with you a little about my Christmas experiences. Just so if you are one of the people, that find themselves even a little dreading the holidays and feeling like a Scrooge, you won’t feel so alone.
I come from a family of mixed religious origins, my mother being Catholic, and my father (of Jewish ancestry) for most of his life being an agnostic. We celebrated Christmas in the Catholic traditions of my Mom. Both parents did their best to make it a happy day. However my Dad, used to be emotionally on edge Christmas days, and usually one or more of “us kids” would set him off. I was most often the one who played this role, despite all my best intentions. After the inevitable meltdown came, my brother Joe would always sing under his breath, “It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas.”
I never did find out why my Dad was so upset those days. I often wonder if it had something to do with the Catholic Church’s role in the Holocaust. Many of his relatives, including his beloved mother perished in concentration camps. The celebration of Christ’s birthday, might evoke other than joyful feelings in that on text. Or it might have been that on those days of family celebration, he would think back to both his mother and father who had died, and feel the sadness of neither of them being with him. As my father died a few years ago, I have no way of asking him now. But I do know that for whatever reason he felt emotionally edgy around Christmas, he passed it on to me, his eldest daughter.
Add that to the other stresses of Christmas: deciding on which presents to buy, braving the crowded stores to try and find the gifts, and doing one’s best to keep within budget. Just thinking about it all is enough for me to say ” Bah!” “Humbug!” For the record, I won’t be a complete Scrooge and forgo Christmas. My 13 year old son would never forgive me, and there are things I do love about the season.
I love the sacred Christmas music- like Handel’s “Messiah”, and songs like “Joy to the World.” Even though I no longer am a Christian, and feel some ambiguity about the lyrics, I love to sing Christmas carols. So I’ll be doing that. I’ll be buying a few gifts, hanging out with family and friends and celebrating. I’ll enjoy wonderful food, and drink and connecting with loved ones.
And you can bet I’m also using the healing modalities such as EFT and the Healing Codes to clear some of the old memories, and scripts that keep me from enjoying the season.
I hope for all of you, whatever might be going on that makes this season difficult, that you also can experience many moments of joy and peace. I found this short video that I hope will inspire you. Renowned Cellist, Yo-Yo Ma, talks about the ideas behind his Christmas song collaboration album “Songs of Joy and Peace” of (2008), and includes some excerpts.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jxChPS9Bm1E
To me the video embodies the spirit in which I seek to celebrate the holidays, with generosity, creativity, friendship and joy. Enjoy!
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